The alarm went off shortly after 1:00 in the night. The pulse exploded, as it always does... What difference does it make? My heart's still beating... We quickly geared up and headed for the "roof of a house" that was on fire. When we arrived, three were burning.
A real battlefield with defined strategies and different actors... Flames up to the sky, smoke, anxious screams, watering, packed engines, background noise, windows slamming forced by the temperature, explosions in the asbestos-cement roofs... The same routine that constantly gets my adrenaline pumping.
I'm Alin, press officer, spokesman for the Suceava military fire brigade. It's not the first job I've had, but everywhere I've worked, I've left my mark, and I wanted whatever my mark was, whatever its nature was, to represent me and to be satisfied with it. And this could only be achieved through responsibility and ownership. And once I got to the fire department, I took on the role of spokesperson. However, I was not content to be a mere provider of information, I became an advocate for my colleagues and the fire service I represent.
And if there were restrictions, logical in a military institution and in an institutional communication, I looked for and found the way to go beyond customs, to keep up with the reality in which we live. First, I started writing in specialized magazines, and then, with the advent of social networks, I built texts, assumed, that could overcome or bypass the institutional barrier and specific language. I used all the discursive weapons I had at my disposal and all the God-given skill I had, to be able to change the public's perception of the unfair attacks my colleagues were subjected to, at certain times or after certain missions.
We are simply human beings. We are neither Superman nor Iron Man. We are not perfect, and we don't have the equipment that would make every job we do a breeze. We've been asked for sandbags, cranes and many other things that don't exist in a firefighters' inventory... Now, we hope no one feels threatened by the garbage, because we don't even have a garbage truck... Last time we were asked to rescue a deer with a lasso. We rescued the deer, as best we could, but because we didn't have the lasso we were called weak...
We are not weak. But, like all humans, we have weaknesses. And you know what the biggest weakness of firefighters is? Children... We suffer when people lose their homes or, sadly, even their lives. Empathy is in our DNA. But when we pull the mutilated body of a child from a pile of rubble, when we find a charred baby in what was once a crib, or when we pull breathless little ones from the depths of water...
In the 18 years since we had become professional firefighters, we've learned everything. How to read fires, how to rescue people from cars, how to be paramedics, divers, pyrotechnicians, mountaineers, chemical, biological, radiological, nuclear and search/rescue specialists... We even learned how to lead rescue dogs or operate all kinds of machinery. But no school in the world, no training centre, teaches you how to hold the dead body of a child in your arms, without thinking about your baby at home...
A few years ago, I was at a fire in Putna, where about three households were affected. The tragedy started from a shed. Three little brothers were playing with fire and set fire to the animal feed inside. They fled, but the youngest, Costel, returned to save his friend, a puppy, who was tied up inside. A cloud of smoke knocked him to the ground. All we found of him was his spine and his little skull... He was only six years old... I got home, and after a long shower, I went into the bedroom and approached the crib where my Irinuca was. She was a few months old and my first child. I took her in my arms, shed a tear and prayed for the soul of Costeluș... I thought in those moments that God, in His goodness, has prepared somewhere in heaven a place for all these "unwanted angels"...
We firemen know, literally, what it means to hurt your soul. And we also know that it takes us a few days to recover from such moments. And we bounce back, because the world needs us and because we need to be strong for our fellow human beings.
We do not expect to be exalted, but neither can we endure all the injustices thrown our way. For my part, I cannot help but defend my colleagues at times like this... Because we leave our families, not knowing whether or not it is the last time we will see our loved ones, and go where someone is in need... We miss important and unique moments in our lives, in the lives of our children and our loved ones in general... Sometimes we're not hungry and have to postpone meals because the alarm goes off... Other times, we come home and can't get the smell of smoke out of our skin, hair and soul with all the water in the world...
We go, on our day off, to a picnic, and watch the people around us enjoying fries or the well-seasoned chicken breast, just off the hot grill... We swallow too, in big chunks, without spoiling the mood of our loved ones with the sight and smell of burnt flesh, still present in our nostrils, from the body of the victim found in the last fire... We smile, we sigh and we move on... Because we are simply humans and we know we can't do it all. But we do our best and we are never cowards and we don't run away from danger or jump to help, no matter how dangerous... Only God is our rock in those moments and the smiles of our children and wife, kept as a talisman in our hearts... The one I was telling you about, we literally know what it's like to hurt...
Looking at what is happening in Romania, to which we, the military, have sworn eternal allegiance, I think we should be better. All of us, without exception! And not just formally, as Christmas approaches... Let's tear down the barriers that turn us from brothers into bitter enemies... Let us learn to control our anger, to listen, to be silent... To see our own weaknesses before we criticize others... To have the courage to forgive, because it takes great courage to admit your mistake or to let go... Let us have the courage of Costelus, in my story, who faced death to save his friend... What a great soul! And how much we can learn from the little ones and their innocence!
Even if it sounds stereotypical, this world would be a much better place if we would just try to be children... At least for a day, and it would be enough for a restart.
After hours of work, even the mirror doesn't recognize me anymore... I told you at the beginning about the alarm that went off at 1 a.m.
What happened next? The water pierced my coat, searching for my skin. And so did the cold. So much fire, so much cold! The drowning just hit me in the face, drying my soot in a cubistic way that would inspire even Pablo.... I can't feel my hands, and my feet... I must resist!
It's been daylight for a long time... I retreat to the back of the truck. I take a sip of water and light a cigarette. I exchange the smoke I've been inhaling all night... The guys from the other shift are here to change us, but it's not over yet... We still have to "rummage" for hidden sparks...
Even the mirror doesn't recognize me anymore... But I know that at home, my folks would discover me from a thousand hidden faces... The little ones and my wife ... can't wait to hold me... And I can't stand their longing, though it's only been 24 hours... There I wash away the smoke, the sins, the forgetfulness, the frustration, everything... That's where I recharge my batteries for next time. To put one more piece of justice in my hands.
